Woddle, run my bath would you and please fend off any more of those infernal complaints about that creature, if it`s not the staff it`s the villagers. He`ll be sold and that`s that, they must understand, there`s little else I can do.
Yes, Your Lordship, I`ll see to it straight away.
What, the bath or the villagers?
Both, Your Lordship. We all know Your Lordship cannot be held responsible if the animal has to go. If it cannot run well enough and earn its keep, then it has no use. I`ll speak to the staff about it myself, I`m sure they will see what has to be done. After all, they should be grateful to Your Lordship for all he does, not just for them but for the village as a whole.
Thank you, Woddle.
Your Lordship.
++++++++++++
++++++++++++
What did `e say? I suppose `e`s still adamant the poor thing will be sold. What`s it to be then Mr Woddle, French meat and German glue? It`s been with us a long time has that one, those of us that`s been 'ere a year or two remember `im as a foal.
Oh, the old bugger won`t budge, you know him as well as I do. That poor horse has given his best but now it seems that`s no good. Bred to win, they said, and just because he`s not winning he`s out. Fodder, just like the rest of us.
Now young David`s back from university, `e`s doing something about it. Loves that horse, `e does, loves `im. One of us that boy, despite the rest of 'em; you can tell by the way 'e drinks `is tea, uses a mug, `e does. And `e takes the bus everywhere.
That`s because he`s disqualified.
From using a cup?
From driving.
Well he could get driven about, like them.
Not since they had to sell the Rolls, he can`t. Even the Mini had to go. That`s why an old horse doesn`t stand a chance.
Got up a collection, that`s what `e`s done. Nearly everyone from the village has put in, there`s enough to give the old fella another go. Proper training that`s what they says `e needs.
The old fool will never allow it, not if he`s already made up his mind.
+++++++++++++++
A large scotch, please Woddle.
Yes Your Lordship. Is the temperature of the bath acceptable?
It`s fine, thank you Woddle.
The cook tells me Master David has got some money together, from the villagers, that could give the horse a reprieve.
Has he by George. In fact, most of the arranging done in The George, no doubt. Well, if that`s what the boy wants, and he`s got the money to do it.
Yes, Your Lordship.
You don`t sound too sure, Woddle.
I can`t help feeling that in his Lordship`s father`s day neither the villagers nor the staff would have been allowed any involvement in the matter. Your people have been the prominent family around here for centuries and I wonder whether this will give ideas to them that should know their place, if Your Lordship knows what I mean.
+++++++++++++++++++
There`s a few that knows horses says e`s got a good chance, maybe even Ascot next year.
Really, I had no idea the horse was that good.
Oh yes, Mr Woddle, `e`s a thoroughbred, sure enough. Plenty of people been sniffing round since they heard 'e might be up for sale, proper racing people.
Not from the Glue factory, then?
Well, you know what peoples like, scare mongering, they say things like that to get everyone going. No, `e`s a gooden. No one realized it `till young David started putting the word out and people got interested.
+++++++++++++++++++++
Your Scotch, Your Lordship.
Thank you, Woddle.
They say the animal has potential, Your Lordship, there`s even talk of Ascot if he`s trained properly.
Ascot. They did say his parentage was good, I just didn`t bother to find out. Maybe he is better than we thought. Enough money to keep him and train him properly, you said.
Apparently so, Your Lordship. And plenty of prize money to come if they are right.
Yes, but of course it`ll have to go to the villagers.
It`s Your Lordship`s horse. The villagers will expect a little something, but they will never understand its true earning potential. A valuable animal like that could help enormously with the finances and this house needs money. Think of it, Your Lordship, fewer taxis, more staff, more wealth, more ... of everything.
Quite right, Woddle, we must keep it, tell the villagers the creature is safe with us.
++++++++++++++++++++
Looks like he`ll retain it after all. Mark you, if it doesn`t start winning it`ll be gone in a shot. And don`t think the villagers will see any of the money, or us, for that matter.
Thank you Mr Woddle, for all you`ve done. I know you would `ave `ad a word with `im, `e listens to you.
I suspect Master David will be pleased.
Wouldn`t be surprised if `e wasn`t down The George right now, workin` `ard on `is strategies. I`ll phone and give `em the good news.
++++++++++++++++++++++
Your bottle of water, Your Lordship.
Bottle of water? I can`t remember asking you to bring me a bottle of water, Woddle.
Oh yes, Your Lordship, as I was leaving His Lordship`s bathroom after bringing up the scotch, I distinctly heard His Lordship say, “whataboutawaterbottlewoddle”.
No comments:
Post a Comment